Back at it...

Well, hello and Happy New Year!

As you can see, there's quite a gap between this and my last entry. That's because back then I was too busy to update it. What's changed? Well, I have no job and therefore I have too much free time on my hands.

The job thing is not due to my bad record or anything...it's for legal reasons that I can't work. Although I want to. We won't go into it, just know that it's frustrating and if the tone of this post goes way into suicide mode, then that's only a reflection on how I feel.

I'll try to keep it bright but no promises.

So, what shall I do with all my free time in this apartment? You tell me. I have a library of books that I don't feel like reading (I have to be totally relaxed in order to enjoy them, and right now I'm tense and on edge), I started learning Flash programming but am too stressed to concentrate on the lessons, I have a million and one DVDs but I've seen them all before. I could get back into the guitar again but I'm growing my nails so that makes it difficult. I could learn a new language but I don't even use the 5 I know already, since I never speak to anyone.

What I have learned, unfortunately, is that when you are feeling low there are only a handful of people you can rely on to support you. I have been finding out who my true friends are this past week and I have been disappointed in certain individuals, who shall remain nameless. I'll cut to the chase: I WAS THERE FOR YOU BUT WHERE ARE YOU NOW THAT I NEED YOU?

You see, in this life you can rely in ONE PERSON ONLY. That person is yourself.

:: There is no particular reason for that particular photo other than it was taken in 1998 when I was happy, had a future, and was in better shape. I never thought I'd miss those days. ::

P.S: RE: Your comment...I never doubted you, Pinky. You're the ONLY one I can rely on. The ONLY one.